JACK'S BLOG
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OpinionCHRISTMAS IS A DAY, at most a week. In its commercial incarnation as practiced in modern America, it is insufferable and, as Scrooge would say, a humbug. The perpetrators of this abomination should be skewered with a sprig of holly and boiled in a plum pudding. The most annoying aspect of it all is the playing of Christmas carols. You can't avoid them, not from Thanksgiving forward to the end of the year. Indeed, they're even creeping into the pre-Thanksgiving holiday week. God save us!
I experienced a similar problem in Hawaii when I lived there in the late 1960s and early 1970s. Traditional Hawaiian music is similarly saccharine. One radio station, KUMU FM, played it every third song. One day a disk jockey complained about the station's playlist and asked motorists to honk their horns if they too were tired of it. Unfortunately, the station manager must have been insulated from the din that rose from the streets of Honolulu that day. I changed the dial to KPOI AM. Is there anyone, even among the most religious Christians, who really wants to hear carols played out of season? Doesn't it denigrate their value? Is it not enough to drive the devout into the ranks of the agnostic or worse, the atheist? Yes, most of it is beautiful, lyrical and, as Mark Twain might comment, full of noble poetry, clever fables, and some good morals. While some is melodious, much was written by baroque composers to be played on massive pipe organs or steam calliopes, and sung by choirs of old ladies with waddles that undulate lasciviously as they strain to reach notes they couldn't reach even in their youth. I remember once filling my mouth with my handkerchief to prevent myself from laughing aloud as a choir of amateur singers, their souls alight with the glory of the season, murdered Handel's Messiah. In another selection, a heavy-jowled baritone especially intrigued me as he attempted to keep up with his choir-mates as they rattled through the “rum-pum-pums” of The Little Drummer Boy. He lagged almost a full three "pums" behind throughout. I know that I can change the station whenever a carol is played on the radio. I can switch the channel when a Christmas special is aired on television. Actually, I don't mind these during Christmas week; but they begin appearing even as we baste the Thanksgiving turkey. However, I must go to the store occasionally. Any store. They all pipe them throughout their establishments for two months. Two months! Please, give it a rest.
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