JACK'S BLOG
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Oh Dark ThirtyMY FIRST SPOUSE was my guide during my first visit to Dante's Inferno. She led me to the Eighth Circle where frauds are punished. That was, after all, the substance of our marriage. However, my latest foray to the infernal regions took me to the Ninth Circle where demons tore and gnashed at my leg. They were named sciatica. A night in the emergency room and a visit to my physician provided me with a substantial stock of Hydrocodone/Acetaminophen for pain, and advice to find some sort of specialist to figure out what was wrong with me. Unfortunately, none agreed on which medical specialty I should consult to help relieve the underlying problem. My x-rays revealed no deformity or injury.
Therein lies the problem. Sciatica is not a diagnosis of a disease or condition. It merely describes symptoms of lower back and leg pain that are the result from some undetermined cause. In other words, all the doctors provided was a word to describe my pain, but no clue as to its cure. Thanks. Anyone watching me writhe on the floor could see that I was in pain. No word was needed. Actually, I don't believe that any word could describe it. I might have visited the specialists, one-at-a-time: orthopedist, neurologist, et al. (It was a safe bet that I could skip the Obstetrician-Gynecologist. I'm not pregnant, one of the common causes of sciatica.) However, my daughter insisted that I begin with her chiropractor. Really? I was skeptical. Like most people, I viewed chiropractic medicine as quackery, but my daughter can be extremely insistent. She had been injured while rowing for a collegiate team and none of the sports medicine specialists had helped. Thus, she swears by the chiropractor who ultimately alleviated her pain. She calls him a witch doctor. I made an appointment to keep peace in the family. You should go, at least once in your life. A visit to a chiropractor is like a visit to The Magic Castle, a Hollywood institution where dinners are served along with magical shows. In addition to diagnosing the root cause of my sciatica, the chiropractor treated me to several demonstrations of medical legerdemain. In addition to the pain, my left leg had lost its strength. No, the muscles hadn't withered. They simply weren't receiving the proper electrical cues from the nerves to perform as they were supposed to. The chiropractor had me wear a pair of magical colored glasses that restored strength to the afflicted leg. How? Beats me. I told you, it's magic! He could also weaken my good leg by simply touching a certain spot on my back. There wasn't any therapeutic benefit to that latter demonstration. I'm sure that he was just showing off. After just three visits with the chiropractor, the pain was relieved and strength was returning. I was able to put the pain medication aside for almost forty-eight hours. Then, one night, the demons returned with reinforcements. If my wife hadn't been at my side to encourage me, I might have blown my brains out. Even the pain pills were useless. I had an appointment with the chiropractor for the next morning but doubted he could help. I had lost the little faith I had acquired in his arts. My wife insisted that we go anyhow. She agreed to start calling the other specialists if he couldn't help. The problem was that chiropractors manipulate your body, especially the spine, and my pain encompassed every part of my back and leg. It included many types of pain including touch and pressure. It felt as though my leg was immersed in hot lava, tons of it. Even the ride to his office was excruciating. I became annoyed with my wife's driving convinced that she was swerving and jerking the car on purpose, and diving into every pothole as retribution for my many sins. When we arrived, the chiropractor went to work and the pain subsided with every adjustment. Within fifteen minutes, it ended. He then began asking questions trying to determine what had occurred to cause the flare up. He knows that I am a writer and speculated that something had happened with my chair. How did he know that? Yes, my office chair has a pneumatic piston that allows the user to adjust seat height. It began leaking air two days before and sank to its lowest setting as soon as I sat on it (no fat jokes please). Ah, there was the problem. Sitting with the knees elevated above the hips was causing my spine to pinch the sciatic nerves. That's when he gave me the magic wedge (no, not a wedgie). It's a simple foam wedge that I sit on to raise my hips above my knees. The wedge worked. I sat on it on the ride home and arrived there without any pain. The bucket seats in the car had been the culprit, not my wife's driving. (I know that she'll smile at this part as she proofs this for publication.) The chiropractor also instructed me to ice my back whenever the pain returns. Whereas the pain pill required about forty-five minutes to take effect, icing the lower back works almost immediately. Also, the pain pill only masks the pain. The cold pack alleviates the swelling that causes the pain. Now, I'm a believer. My wife and I are annoying everyone we know with this tale. Anyone who suffers pain is lectured on the reasons why they should hie themselves off to the chiropractor. See me next week, and I'll tell you about bats' wings and eye of newt.
10 Comments
Great read Jack very positive and I am well pleased that you have found a safe cure for sciatica and that you are keeping the peace in the house. That journey in the car with pot holes sounds a bit of a rough journey well done. Your wife must be well pleased too. All the best from UK to you and your family. those chiropractors seem to be worth their weight in salt. My friend a few years ago she liked chiaropractor becuase he would move the bumps of stress around her body, you could see the lumps. She would have him move these lumps to the most comfortable place, this she said could take weeks. I think she said she got her feet done there too, dry skin or something like that. There is quackery and then there is a plain good investment. Thanks for sharing this straightest line to recovery have a great weekend and bright blessings. If its good enough for the popes of this world then its good enough for me.
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Jack Durish
2/15/2013 01:47:20 pm
Thanks for stopping by and commenting. Next week, I may write about the side effects of the pain meds
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2/15/2013 03:40:57 pm
Good to know, Jack! Mr Sciatica and I are fast becoming arch enemies. I had never even considered a "witch doctor", even though I'm a fan of herbal remedies for almost everything! Sounds like the laying on of hands might be just the thing.
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Jack Durish
2/16/2013 03:24:45 am
There may be other options, but it appears the "reputable" medicos are stuck on dispensing pills and doing little more
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2/15/2013 07:01:21 pm
Great post, Jack,
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Jack Durish
2/16/2013 03:26:00 am
Well, no one can attribute my "success" to a placebo effect. For that to happen, I would have had to approached the chiropractor with a belief in his methods
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2/17/2013 12:08:49 am
My wife and I both have long been supporters of chiropractors. They once were considered just on the outer fringe of shamanism, but our regular medical doctor recently made an appointment with a chiropractor for my wife's back problem. They do a lot of good. I'm glad you found a good one.
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Jack Durish
2/17/2013 04:09:45 am
Same to you
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2/26/2013 07:59:39 am
Great article. I really believe in chiropracters and holistic physicians. I believe they have their place in health care. I wouldn't go so far as use them exclusively, but they are still helpful in helping with pain (I have fibromyalgia).
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Jack Durish
2/26/2013 08:07:17 am
Pain is very useful in warning us of danger that may result in injury, or to alert us to an injury. But, ailments that simply produce pain for its own sake are just not fair
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